hamachi helps lag to go away but unfortunately zsnes is 1.43 is the only really good netplay system. snes9x will work but if you have hamachi you could maybe reach a few states/provinces away with little lag. ideal for playing with real life friends would be to just to use snes9x here as is. It's all really complicated and my friends and I have spent weekends figuring this stuff out. Pretty much have it mastered now

---------- Post added at 11:25 PM ---------- Previous post was at 11:24 PM ----------
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Gmail has free voice over internet. You can call any phone in North America for free from your computer or call someone's gmail. You just need a cheap microphone and speakers. It is probably the best way to communicate with each other while setting this up since typing during a game is not very easy.
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That and Skype, it's free too, you can always use headphones/earphones as a mic too depending on your computer... Strange, yet true.